Why Is It So Hard to Accept Ourselves – Just As We Are?

We accept our pets, our dogs of different sizes, right? Why do we have such a hard time accepting ourselves of various sizes?

What I saw at the dog park

I was at the dog park with my Great Dane Lex and watching all the different-sized dogs running around having such a great time. There were leaner dogs, athletic dogs, anddog park there were fluffier ones. There were active dogs as well as more passive ones sitting on the sidelines. Even though we were in the big dog park, there were little weenie dogs running around – they just had to be there hanging out with the big boys. (The weenie ones love Lex!)

It’s not in your DNA

So many people – myself included back in my dieting days – try to achieve a physique, a size, a weight, that just genetically is not possible. I remember longing for my mom’s lean legs and yet instead I inherited my dad’s thick thighs. Eventually, I came to accept that.

Perhaps you’re built a bit fluffier, like a St Bernard or a Great Pyrenees, or maybe you’re on the leaner side like a greyhound or my boy Lex.

No matter how hard you try, no matter how many hours you spend at the gym, no matter how obsessive you become about every bite you take, physically you might not be able to achieve that size. It’s not in your DNA.

Sure. You may be able to slim down a little bit, but at what cost?


Why do women struggle with such things—whether it’s dieting, wellness plan, or clean eating? With the internet, social media, and influencers it’s worse. Thank goodness I grew up in the pre-internet/pre-social media era. With my then existing insecurities it would have been a nightmare.

Acceptance is so important for physical and emotional health. I want people – especially women – to accept who they are and what they have.

Too many hours wasted

Looking back, I think of the many years, hours, minutes wasted trying to achieve a physicality I could never attain. (I’ve written about my story, posted on my About page here. It’s still a journey.)

Although I’ll never get back the years wasted being concerned about my physique, perhaps my message will inspire other women not to go down that path—no matter their shape, be it fluffier or more lean.

Let’s be like our dogs and accept our varying sizes. Yeah, do that.


P.S. If you struggle with acceptance, please schedule a strategy session with me and let’s chat.

Click image to watch video.

Why Is It So Hard to Accept Ourselves - Just As We Are?

Jennifer “Neily” Neily, MS, RDN, LD, FAND
Neily on Nutrition
Registered Dietitian Nutritionist
Wellcoach® Certified Health Coach
Fellow of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics

Photo credits: Neily on Nutrition

Website & blog: NeilyonNutrition.com
Facebook:  facebook.com/NeilyonNutrition
Twitter:  twitter.com/JenniferNeily (@JenniferNeily)
YouTube: youtube.com/NeilyonNutrition
Instagram:  @NeilyonNutrition



  1. Monet Claire

    I thought your article was “right on.” Thank you.

    • Neily

      Glad you liked it! 🙂


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *